All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
I started asking God for moments. I asked for moments that would mean something to to me. Moments that would confirm what I had decided in my heart… The decision to put my all into “round two” in Burundi. I was so near quitting… and THAT, well, it felt like my heart was shriveling up right in front of me. Quitting would have been ok, too. In fact, I wouldn’t have called it quitting… I would have touted it as choosing. Choosing another way of life, and it would have been. My gut didn’t say “get out” my gut said, “change the way you are doing things.”
It’s hard to admit to yourself (and everyone) that you can’t take the heat in the kitchen when everybody else looks like they are handling the heat just fine. They look like they are in air-conditioned bliss while you ask everyone around you, “Is it just me, or is it hot in here?” I felt unsteady on my “I’m sticking it out” legs… so, I asked God for these “moments.” God brought them. In droves. I have been in AWE with gratitude EVERY DAY.
I’m learning, slowly, to trade in my anxiety. I’m trading it in for a big fat slice of gratitude… and I’m watching the tide of the Sea Of Goodness roll in.
Images: Bujumbura public gardens. Canon EOS3, Portra 400, RPL
Beautiful. We all need these moments in order to press on. Lately I am relying on a poem Desiderata by Max Ehrman. It centers me and lets me continue on with what life is throwing at me.
What we focus on GROWS. And you, dear friend, are choosing to grow moments of light, beauty, courage, gratitude, grace and transformation. May the *Sea of Goodness* gently soak and restore your body and spirit {moment by moment}. As Laura would say, Roll Tide Roll!
“May the words we speak and write today heal, bring unity, and be inspired by the God who loves us.” Donald Miller
Just wanted you to know that your words do encourage, heal, and bring unity. Truly inspired by God, you are.
Sometimes I think I could be your soul mate although we’ve never met. Both trips to Uganda have sent me topsy tervy on violence, injustice, poverty- I feel good there- there is a sense of communal living and joy despite some hard conditions but than I get angry at the abundance and waste and apathy here, it tears at me. I don’t think its really apathy though as I saw the community of Houston wrap there arms around my sister and her family since she was diagnosed and had surgery for breast cancer with complications. It seems just overwhelming sometimes to know how to help or what to do with limited resources. Writing and taking pictures are my outlet to sharing life. Maybe someday I’ll actually meet you either in Burundi or the US. Keep enjoying the adventure and sharing it with us, even the bad days. Sue J
Oh wow people. THANK YOU. Growing beautiful things right over here!